March 27, 2015

10 Awesome Things About Being a Woman

You know who gets a really bad rap? Debbie Downer.

But then again, maybe it's sort of her own fault. I mean, it's pretty annoying when someone complains all the time, you know?

Which is exactly why I am writing the post I am today. You see, this week, I was Deborah T. Downer herself. I spent all Monday complaining about the state of my gums and then followed it up Tuesday complaining about being a woman.

Even Debbie would've been sick of the negativity.

So today, I'm going to balance out the score a little bit: while being a girl can sometimes suck, sometimes being a girl can also be awesome. And here are ten reasons why.

If you don't have them, its awesome because running involves a lot less bouncing. And if you do have them, it's awesome because... well, you have them.

(And yes, I did just pluralize "penis" like that.) I've never had one, but penises just seem inconvenient and really, a liability in almost any sport.

When women get dressed up, there's an endless world of opportunities out there. When men get dressed up, they're either wearing a suit or they're wearing something inappropriate.

Yeah, we have a lot more to shave but if we get lazy, we can just cover the hairy parts up. If men try that trick, they're going to get some side-eye if they walk into a bank.

I know men are sensitive and are allowed to cry, but seriously: are you really going to look at your boyfriend the same after he loses it watching "the Fox and the Hound"?

Our voices don't change. One awkward crisis averted.

Listen, I'm all for gender equality and feminism and we can do it wearing headscarves and crap, but it's just the way it is: when it comes to first dates, our bar is a lot lower.

Periods suck but on the other hand, as long as you don't overdo it, a lot can be forgiven because it's "that time of the month."

Dresses and skirts are just so freeing. And unless they're a wizard or Irish, men just don't get to experience that liberty.

Because Hermione reminds us that whether we have Beyonce's butt or frizzy hair and buckteeth, we can still kick ass.