December 30, 2014

Allow Me to Introduce Myself and My Giant Cartoon Head


If you've been reading my blog for a while, you probably noticed that it recently got a face lift.

Obviously, the most impressive part of my new design is the big-headed caricature on the left that looks creepily like me.


(The art is compliments of Jerry from Emerson Art who, by the way, is awesome to work with and who is clearly very talented).

And so I figured that now, while everyone is looking at that huge cartoonified head of mine over there, would be a great time to introduce myself. (Or I guess re-introduce myself, if you've been reading for a while.)

So, hi. I'm Nicole, the blogger whose head is fairly average size, despite what my blog design would lead one to believe.

I'm 24 years old. I graduated college in 2012 and have spent the three years since then leisurely making my way around the country, from Melbourne, FL, to West Palm Beach, FL, to Chicago, IL, to Arlington, VA (where I live now).

I work as a patent agent for a law firm in Washington, DC, where I spend most of my time reading patents about biochemistry-ish inventions and convincing my parents that my degree in biochemistry is relevant.

I grew up in a suburb 20 minutes outside of Baltimore. I put Old Bay in my potato salad and I have cried legitimate tears over a Ravens loss on more than one occasion.

Despite occasionally being a bit of a smartass, I'm usually pretty agreeable... except when I'm hungry. Then I'm a hangry b*tch. So much so that my boyfriend, Derrick, named my hangry alter ego four years ago. "Nikki" really has no regard for anyone or anything besides finding herself a sandwich.

I ran cross country in high school and college, and wasn't bad. My best 5K time was 17:45, something that I like to think about when I run out of toilet paper to convince myself that my life has not been a series of complete failures.

After college, I ran three marathons in three states: Florida, Michigan, and the 2014 Boston Marathon. And as a somewhat-experienced marathoner, I truly believe that marathons are physically, mentally, and emotionally horrible experiences that really have no business being a hobby.


That being said, I plan on running at least one more before I die. I'm six minutes away from my goal of breaking three hours, which is too infuriatingly close to quit now.

I'm a "strong" introvert according to Myers–Briggs, which might be why I blog.

I come from a long line of wine drinkers. And it's safe to say that that gene doesn't skip a generation.

My favorite movies are Gladiator, Remember the Titans, and the Princess Bride. Harry Potter is my favorite book; I've read all seven from beginning to end no less than three times each, but can't count how many chapters I've read at random when I'm bored.

I'm in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend from college, who lives in Florida. Thanks to him, I've gotten really, really good at airport security.


It's not necessarily that I can't cook. It's just that I don't.

My front right tooth is fake. Some girl knocked it out when I was in high school as I was going up for a rebound in a basketball game.

I have a younger brother and a younger sister. They can drive me nuts and always left our bathroom a mess when we were younger. They also are probably the only people in the world I would, without hesitation, take a bullet for.

I just really like tacos. And I think that about sums it up.

If you're a new reader, I'm happy to introduce myself and even happier that you're here! If you're a veteran reader, hopefully there was something on this list you didn't know before.

And if you're an internet lurker who plans on using this information for future catfishing endeavors, well... scram. No one invited you here.