September 09, 2014

A Very Bad Monday

Monday, this one's for you.
Call me a softie, but I have always tried to give Monday the benefit of the doubt. Everyone is always hating on him but for all we really know, Sunday took his seat when he got up to go to the bathroom. Maybe Sunday's the guy we all should be hating.

But after yesterday, no more. I won't say that it was the worst Monday ever, but only because the day after my 21st birthday was a Monday. (And that day was in a league all of its own.)

But with that particular Monday, at least I brought the misery upon myself. (Or at least the shots of vodka did.) But yesterday? Yesterday had no reason to play so dirty

It started like usual, blog post scheduled for 7AM, Trader Joe's muffins and a Bartlett Pear for breakfast. Actually it started off even better than usual; I was preeeeeetty proud of myself for my witty post declaring my love for the Baltimore Ravens and my Bartlett Pear was especially plumply peary.

But then it all started going wrong. First, and as I'm sure you all know, I wasn't the only one talking about the Ravens that morning. Or more specifically, just one Raven in particular. (Although I will say, I think Ray Rice had a much worse Monday than me.)

That situation actually is nothing to joke about. I don't think the Ravens had a choice but to let him go but I do actually feel bad for the guy. That's not to be confused with me defending his actions; they were absolutely disgusting. But I know what regret feels like and it can be really tough to swallow; I have no idea how you live with regret of the magnitude he's facing. I want to believe he's actually an okay human being who just let his temper get out of hand and if that's true, I'm not sure anyone can punish him as much as he's punishing himself.

Regardless, quietly taking down my lighthearted post about the team wasn't a pleasant feeling.

But you know what was even less of a pleasant feeling? The next few hours of food poisoning. Or perhaps it was stress. Or maybe I ate one pound too many "cotton candy grapes" this weekend. (Yes, they're real.) Or maybe all three. Regardless, after hearing the news about Ray Rice, things just sort of spiraled out of control for me until finally I threw in the towel and decided to leave work early.

There are few things in life more excruciating than trying to eat rice with chopsticks. Riding public transportation with food poisoning is one of them. I would not wish that upon the most passionate Patriots fan.

And for your sake perhaps more than mine, I will stop there.

Now, I know that my Monday could have been worse. For example, I could have had 15 shots of Abslolut the night before. Or been banned from work indefinitely.

But at the same time... Monday, did you really have to be so cruel?